Word Count is off! Let’s focus on the theme of the thing. Not many actually stick to the word count anyway. (SUGGESTED-No more than 500 if you want to try that.)
- Using the prompt of ‘Surprise‘, WRITE. A surprise can be anything. Surprise me with yours. (REQUIRED)
DEADLINE IS:
23:59 EST (New York Time) Wednesday.
To read more about this challenge, click Here.
The surprise was she came at all. He hadn’t expected it. She never did the expected.
“So,” she asked, swinging easily down in the chair across from him, hair dancing about her face. Sexy. She was so damn sexy, but he forced his mind to focus on the important.
“I’m surprised you came.”
“Darling, you know I adore you more than anything.”
Thing. Yes, that was the reality of the matter.
“Yes, whatever.” He paused, turning his coke can, laying ring after ring of condensation on the dark tabletop. “I’ve been thinking.”
She laughed, reaching across to touch his hand. “You know what I’ve told you about that, darling.”
“What?”
“Thinking too much.”
He grimaced. This was what she did, distracted him from his real purpose, his truth.
“I’m busy today,” she went on, eyes loving him.
It was a lie, but a lie he desperately wanted to believe.
“Can we do this later?” She cocked her head, smiled. “Tonight, when we have all the time in the world. Just us.” Her voice softened to a purr, smile promising things he couldn’t refuse.
He was addicted. That was the thing. Addicted.
She rose, leaning over to kiss his cheek. “Tonight, darling.” Her voice promised things he’d never have.
Which came first, the chicken or the egg? Man or mouse? Man or mouse?
He watched her walk away, swing in her hips affecting him deep down inside. Finally, he faced the truth.
She owned hm.
He ran towards her, calling out her name. The street and sidewalk were busy all around, forcing him to duck and dodge.
“Valarie, wait!” he called, skirting around a parked car.
To his surprise, she turned.
Man or mouse? Chicken or egg?
When he stepped in front of the truck, her irritation turned to confusion and then, at the last second, to surprise.
Finally, he’d surprised her.
Gripping dialogue and surprising ending. I enjoyed this!
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Thanks so much. It’s so nice to get feedback.
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Great ending. Tough on the poor sod though 🙂
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Thanks, yes it was. Poor guy, but at least he is free:) Of her!
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Yes, gripping indeed. And again, top class dialogue.
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Many thanks:)
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