“People think a soul mate is your perfect fit, and that’s what everyone wants. But a true soul mate is a mirror, the person who shows you everything that is holding you back, the person who brings you to your own attention so you can change your life.
― Elizabeth Gilbert, Eat, Pray, Love
“When one door of happiness closes, another opens; but often we look so long at the closed door that we do not see the one which has been opened for us.”
― Helen Keller
“A rock pile ceases to be a rock pile the moment a single man contemplates it, bearing within him the image of a cathedral.”
― Antoine de Saint-Exupery, The Little Prince
“Grown-ups love figures… When you tell them you’ve made a new friend they never ask you any questions about essential matters. They never say to you “What does his voice sound like? What games does he love best? Does he collect butterflies? ” Instead they demand “How old is he? How much does he weigh? How much money does his father make? ” Only from these figures do they think they have learned anything about him.”
― Antoine de Saint-Exupéry, The Little Prince
“Somewhere, something incredible is waiting to be known.”
― Carl Sag
Is it possible to live a normal life and never tell a lie?
Not even a little white lie. Why would you want to do this, you ask. Well, think of how much better the world would be if there were no lies.
“Why did you attack my country?”
“I had a bit of bad beef.”
“Why don’t you like me?”
“You are a bit too outgoing for me.”
Think of it. No lies forever. For anything. For anybody. They say the truth hurts, but in the end it hurts less than the lie.
The real reason I’m asking this is because I have been trying over the last years of my life to live a lie-less life. And, I have to admit, it is hard. I think as human being we are programed to lie because we don’t want others to see what we consider the dark, the bad, the weak, inside each of us.
After all, what do little white lies hurt?
“A lovely dress.”
“I love your hair.”
“You did fantastic up there.”
All white lies under the assumption the dress is not lovely, the hair is horrible and the person bombed in front off whatever audience was present. But are they bad, these lies? They spare the other person’s feeling, but at what expense? Would we be better to tell the honest truth each and every time?
I find the white lies coming to my tongue even when I know they are white lies, when I know they are wrong, and when I know the truth would be a better option. It is so much easier to just blur out the white lie and move on. No hurt feeling. No tears. No explaining.
But is it right?
The big lies are something else and I have a much easier time avoiding them. When I make a big blunder, I own up to it and move on, no matter how dark and bad and weak it makes me feel. I can stomach the big stuff, but the little stuff is still too hard. We all want to be liked and accepted. Would we be liked if we always told the truth? In today’s world, I think not.
Sadly, it is true. We don’t want people who tell us the honest truth. We want the white lies and the mis-truths, the lies of omission. Who wants to be told their dress is horrible or their hair is a wreak or they bombed.
I don’t. Do you?
So then how do we handle the little white lies? Because in the end, they do hurt us. Eventually we find out the truth and it hurts. Truth or not, we don’t always want the truth. It is more comfortable, in the moment, to live with the white lie.
But, what would it be like? To live in a lie-less world. Would we hate each other more or less? Would we fight more or less? Would we kill each other at the alarming rate of the modern world?
We will never know the answers to these questions until, if, we banish all the lies. It is a beautiful dream. Do you think it is possible?
“Time and space are illusions. Everything exists at the same time. We only see what we are tuned to the vibration of to see.”
― Darryl Anka
Whoever is trying to bring you down, is already below you.
BY ATHLING2001
When I first read the quote above, I had no clue what it meant. I couldn’t form the words into any semblance of understanding. Then it hit me and I understood with every fiber of my being. Like a bodyguard protecting a client, we hide our sadness behind anger. Anger is our shield to protect us from exposing our emotions to the world.
So much of the world lives on the edge between sadness and happiness. The cars and houses and huge TV’s don’t bring the happiness expected. Instead, sadness settles deep inside, a loss we might not even understand. Because we won’t – or aren’t able – to admit the sadness at the center of our supposed ‘search for happiness,’ we pretend the sadness isn’t there. We get angry at the people, events, politicians, (add your own favorites) we ‘think’ are keeping us from the happiness we deserve.
The truth is, we aren’t entitled to ‘happiness’ just because we exist. Every one of us is responsible for tearing down our own shield of anger and confronting the reality of life. Is all the anger in the world just hiding sadness over lives failing to fulfilled our own expected potential?
I lash out when I’m sad, trying to avoid some issue in my life. I don’t like feeling out-of-control. The funny thing is, I know I’m hiding but I can’t help myself. It’s easier to blame the world than to admit to the sadness settled inside me. It takes me a few hours, or days, to talk myself around to admitting the sadness hiding behind my armor.
If I am sad over a bill, with no clue where to find the money to pay, I get angry. If only I had a better paying job; didn’t have to support my (adult) kids; if my mortgage company hadn’t screwed over some perceived slight. You get the picture.
We all struggle with these feeling ever day. It’s the ostrich head in the sand syndrome. If I don’t acknowledge the problem, it just might go away. I might win the lottery (if I played) or I might find a fortune in my attic (fat chance). Or I might just wind my way around to acknowledging my anger and deal with the problem head-on. It doesn’t matter if I come up with an acceptable solution – such as where to get the money – I’ve confronted the issue. That alone given me the peace needed to calmly and logically deal with the problem.
What if we could strip away the anger of the world, banish every shred guarding the sadness of an entire planet? What would be left for every man, woman and child? Sadness. And then what if we acknowledged the sadness, every one of us on the entire planet. What if nobody felt out-of-control?
What would our planet look like then?
When it hurts, observe. Life is trying to teach you something.
A Writer's Life 
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